today i am feeling totally lost have thought a lot but nothing comes oout except my feeling of screaming Sometimes I SCREAM but silently!!!! Well, I'm not referring to any of the song you migh have heard but just trying to explain what I feel.... I feel like screaming silently. its like few weeks that i am not that busy and have to be at home surfing the net and triyng to write down but it is not happening....I want to scream... but do it silently!
Here, these days in the world there are no 'kya haal hain' but 'Hellos', no 'friends and buddies' but 'colleagues', no 'bakwass' but 'pretentious intellectual talks', no 'hanging out' but 'meetings', no 'vellegiri' just 'sophistication and performance'...no "sunbstantive action but ideal discussion' Te list goes on and on and on..... I want to scream... but do it silently!.
Its not like I'm not liking my life. thereare hundered of things i love i love the freedom of movement LITERALLY i am enjoying, i like thinking what i feel like and not forcing my self to think upon something specific and to come out with a time bound solutions, feel great to call anyone any time,, its great to throw party when people enjoy and ask about the occasion and i enjoy saying no occasion, but even after that... I want to scream... but do it silently!
Friends are getting busy, weekend just fly away, 'more important' stuff comes by. Rukhsaar does not turn up to help in house hold work, we have to do the cooking the cleaning and still have to stay in s dirty...all the time messed up home... the TV is there but nothing interesting turns up... when ever the nice films are there they are already half gone and then the electicty is gone... i hate the pain in my shoulders... I want to scream... but do it silently!
I write and it gets deleted before sending, i take a mental note and it soon disappears, i remeber only thing that there was something to be done! i feel like going for the walk in the morning and its already 9. The moment i think of someone, one of my heartbeat skips.... i lie in the corner of my bed with the pillow over my head and feel a tear rolling down on my cheek.....then i scream but still silently.......ughhhhhhhghghghghhhghghghghghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Here, these days in the world there are no 'kya haal hain' but 'Hellos', no 'friends and buddies' but 'colleagues', no 'bakwass' but 'pretentious intellectual talks', no 'hanging out' but 'meetings', no 'vellegiri' just 'sophistication and performance'...no "sunbstantive action but ideal discussion' Te list goes on and on and on..... I want to scream... but do it silently!.
Its not like I'm not liking my life. thereare hundered of things i love i love the freedom of movement LITERALLY i am enjoying, i like thinking what i feel like and not forcing my self to think upon something specific and to come out with a time bound solutions, feel great to call anyone any time,, its great to throw party when people enjoy and ask about the occasion and i enjoy saying no occasion, but even after that... I want to scream... but do it silently!
Friends are getting busy, weekend just fly away, 'more important' stuff comes by. Rukhsaar does not turn up to help in house hold work, we have to do the cooking the cleaning and still have to stay in s dirty...all the time messed up home... the TV is there but nothing interesting turns up... when ever the nice films are there they are already half gone and then the electicty is gone... i hate the pain in my shoulders... I want to scream... but do it silently!
I write and it gets deleted before sending, i take a mental note and it soon disappears, i remeber only thing that there was something to be done! i feel like going for the walk in the morning and its already 9. The moment i think of someone, one of my heartbeat skips.... i lie in the corner of my bed with the pillow over my head and feel a tear rolling down on my cheek.....then i scream but still silently.......ughhhhhhhghghghghhhghghghghghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment